Sounds very similar. I think the problem was J329 but the garage changed the others because I had installed a couple of used 381's. I had a job tracking down which relay/s was/were the problem.
J329 is 8D0 951 253 is colour grey and has 370 on the top. J53 & J695 are part No 431 951 253G are purple and have 381 on the top. They are located behind the trim in front of the steering column. The works manual page/drawing is A97-0403 (Google it), J329 is No3 and the other two are Nos 2 & 5. J329, which carries the power was only £14.95 plus vat the other two were 31.44 each plus VAT.
Good luck hope it works for you.
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Since new - 2005 (05) Akoya Silver 3.0 TDI Quattro everything standard except wheels. 145,000 miles.
Bought at 9 months old - Ming Blue 2001 (51) 2.8 Quattro Sport with Sat Nav. 122,000 miles
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