Another Dealer Story

[CliveH]

Another tale :

Last week, ordered some front mats for the S4.

Got the usual "we need your chassis number or registration to make sure we get you exactly the right parts for you..." These are mats for goodness sake, for a B5 S4 please, were there really so many variations??! Well according to the little man, "well, there could have been", so he punches in the reg, goes from one screen to the next, back again, writes something down, back into the other screen....scratches his head...

"what colour?"....."cant you tell that from the reg?"....."errr, no"...."well they look dark grey to me"...."we have black or grey"....."well, I'd say grey, but I just happen to be in the car today, so I'll bring one in".....

I present the mat to the little man (it's definitely dark grey) - "black" he says. "They look grey to me"....."well, they call that black Sir"....fine OK, just get them ordered and we'll see what turns up....so I pay my £38 and off comes an invoice which says "onyx".....hmmmm.....after over 20mins of frustration I really need to get back to work....

2 days later I get a call to say that they're in stock, call in to pick them up and guess what? No, you're wrong, they're actually the right colour...!!! So off I go, happy as a man, well, who's just collected the right colour mats against all the odds...

That evening I go to fit the mats. Now I have to admit to being a bit mechanically challenged, but I set about this task without a 'how-to', carefully removing the packaging, although I did need some pliers to remove the pins holding the 2 mats together... Now I'm on a roll and into the car with the mats....remove the old mats, which pop off their fasteners....and working on the basis that 'installation is the reverse of removal', my excitement reaches new heights as I place the new mats on the floor.....and now for the fastenings...............

[Conan_the_Librarian]

What, What????? I'm all excited. When's the next installment. Do you die int in the end? Is a ball of fire involved?

This has the potential to be a great story......

[CliveH]

LOL, yes there is a Part 2

well, the colour matched perfectly, and they were exactly the right size, but the fixings....hmmmm....

now, as already alluded to, I am a little mechanically challenged, so when at first the mats didn't pop straight onto the little prongs in the carpet, I just shrugged my shoulders and promptly went into the garage...wondering if I needed a 12mm socket or perhaps one of those torx thingumies...

of course, I came back from the garage empty handed, but still thinking that I was missing something blindingly obvious (such as the pickle I get into when fitting wiper blades... ), but no - on close examination, the fitment really is plug and pray, they should clip straight on....but they didnt as the fixings on the new mats were quite different to the original ones!

unbelievable! after all that time in the dealership, making sure "exactly the right parts" were ordered..........

[Conan_the_Librarian]

Cor Blimey! Riveting stuff! (Look a pun )

Is part 3 where you go back to the dealership and exact revenge with a flame thrower, grenades and a machette? Hope it is......

[CliveH]

PMSL!

yes, something like that Mike...

[PsYcHe]

If not a machete, then at least a big stick with a nail in the end

[CliveH]

so, I strolled back into the Parts Dept, putting on my best "I'm not a happy customer" face (as really I found it all quite amusing).....it went something like this....

"Good Morning"

"Good Morning Sir, how can I help you?" as if he'd never seen me before (it always amazes me that these heavily stocked places are normally always empty, and you have to ring a bell for attention, so he cant have had that many punters in since the previous day) but clearly he had no recollection whatsoever....

"I bought these mats yesterday"

"Yes Sir" still looking blank

"For an S4"

"Yes"

"You spent a lot of time on your system making sure you got the right part number and colour code for my car"

"errrmmm"......"ah yes Sir" the penny finally dropped... "are they the wrong colour?" he looked really surprised....

"no"

"oh" he looked relieved but then realised that wasnt the end of the story "dont they fit then?"

"yes, perfectly" now his face was glazing over and looking really puzzled "let me clarify that - when I say they fit, I meant they are exactly the right size" now he's looking at me for inspiration, some clue or other... but now silence

"it's the fixings" I said as I turned over one of the mats and then produced the original one

"they look the same size to me"

"well they're not actually although there isnt much in it, but if you look closely you'll see that the fitment is quite different"

"hmmmmm" some serious scratching of the chin and a deep intake of breath "what sort of fitting is in the car?"

"well prongs which fit the original mats, but not these ones, they're a different fitment"

"hmmmmm" more silence and headscratching...now onto the computer....

"look, you ordered the part to fit the car, based on reg number, but clearly it doesnt - perhaps if you put the part number into your system, it will show that it's for a different car or year? This is a facelift model but I wasnt aware that they'd lifted the carpet"... the sarcasm was lost on him...

now frantically in and out of ETKA (or whatever the dealerships use), back to a program which brings up my car, showing VIN number, where it was bought, Audi service history (not been near an Audi dealership since I bought it), inside leg measurement of the previous 2 owners, you name it....

back to ETKA, writes something on the invoice, into another program, back out again....then he rushes off out the back....

back to the computer, in and out of programs again, writes something else on the invoice, out the back again....

back to the ordering system, types in a new part number "they'll be here for you on Saturday morning" he announces as if the whole thing were so simple and sounded so confident that it was right this time

"are you sure you've got the right ones this time?" the look on his face was quite discerning, and I didnt get a yes or a no

"we can always send them back if they're not right"

inspired by his confidence, I walked out with a chuckle but thinking I wouldnt be treating it in such a lighthearted manner if these were parts I desperately needed to get the car going....

Stand by for the final installment............

[CliveH]

I forgot to add that when I offered to leave the wrong mats with him, he said it was entirely up to me as they'd been removed from the packaging and were 'used' now...

[Just_Ben]

I have to deal with this every day!! Not with floor mats specifically, but with bits being wrong. I use the main dealers for parts as they are the best quality, carry a full 2 year warranty and are supplied by "experts".

I feel the true definition of and expert comes into play here!

I see a lot of rare Audi models here and it is not uncommon for the fella on the other end of the phone from whom I am ordering, tells me that the car in front of me does not exist!!!!

There has not been a single full week gone by since my opening where at least one item has been delivered incorrect. Most recently this Saturday when a customer drove all the way from Liverpool for me to replace his PAS pump, only to find it was wrong.

The rather interesting conversation I then had with the supplier ended with him saying... "oh, yeah, found it. There's 2 types... Sorry mate....".

Ofcourse, this responce made it all allright and I was more than satisfied......

[Conan_the_Librarian]

Ooooooooo there's more! I can't wait. Bit disapointed there was no unecassary use of a Flame thrower but you can't have everything.

Almost can't put this one down. Must be enough material for a sequel.

Something along the lines of 'Rampage of the AACC - Audi UKs nemesis'

Lots of burning subframes with Audi customer service opratives cable-tied to them. Some gratuitus drownings in 'filled for life ATF' and maybe a bit of 'see if you can breath with your face pushed into the carpet in my passengers footwell. You'll need gills'.

P.S.

I move this to it's own thread for fear of hijacking......