Quote:
Originally Posted by Conan_the_Librarian
Bill,
I am happy to write a note for you to the Long Haired Admiral! Something along the lines of.....
Dear Mrs Blank,
Please could Bill come out to play. We have noticed that he is reaching dangerous levels of cynicism and strongly advise that he be allowed to spend a day with other poor cynical and intellectually stunted Audi 8 owners who can help with group therapy sessions and the emotional sharing of life changing moments. While nearly all under endowed and emotionally unstable, we do have common purpose and are fundamentally good people. None of us have run over a small furry animal in the last 24 hours, nor do we harbour grudges against birds that crap on our cars for more than an eternity. We tolerate hot hatch drivers that are so visually impaired they believe (only briefly) that their Halfrauds Saxo 106 cicncentqunto plastic 3 cyclinder special has the slightest chance at the lights against us. We have been known to allow our wives and sometimes our children to sit in our cars without cable-tying their hands and feet together and indeed I myself have had someone else's children in the car without having to be in a sack in the boot bound and gagged (although they ended up there when they tried to use the unused passenger entertainment system).
So, please, please PLEASE can Bill come out to play.
Yours almost sincerely,
The A/S 8 Forum Pygmies 
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I broached this and pointed out that I had a note. I am now officially a "sad Barsteward". But she didn't say no so I shall take that as implied consent and plan accordingly.
"does dear wittle Billy want to go and play with his new wittle fwends on the internet, aaaaah"
We work together so next monday will be such fun. 
Bill
PS. The first Vectra to spray mud on my car will be shown the superiority of 4wd by being towed backwards across said field at speed by me whilst some willing volunteers from our august body don red coats and in the manner of our inbred betters chase said Luton-ite awfullness whilst shouting tally ho and other traditional yokel-ish phrases until we get bored and set the dogs on the peasants...
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"Man Math" - The means by which a caring husband convinces his wife that a 4.2 A8 is in fact cheaper to run than a tiny Auto crap box
"Being in touch with your feminine side" - The ability to, in the 30 seconds following a major accident, obtain your wifes approval for replacing your big german car with another "because otherwise we'd be dead".
See also sulking for two years until she finally allows you to get another purely on the basis of your current one being the wrong colour.
Last edited by billblank; 17th February 2009 at 08:37 PM.
Reason: forgot to be rude about Vectras
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