Sorry to hear all your woes also Tony that's pretty poor from Audi though
You will get loads of possible symptoms from the battery being flat so the first thing should be to diagnose if it just needs a charge or a recondition and then wait to see if the other issues are still there when it's fully charged and then run. Even EPB problems can sometimes be caused by the same. If you do need an EPB motor then Euro car parts are the cheapest at about £150 after you've chopped the old one back in for re-condition.
Hope you get to the bottom of it and keep the faith, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you
__________________
Confidence is the feeling you have before you know better . . . . 
Audi A8 D2 3.7 Quattro Sport 1999 FL - Melange
2nd Place Winner - A8-Freunde Annual German Meet 2012 at Edersee
20" x 9" Bentley GTC Wheels with 385mm W12 Front Discs & Bentley Caliper Covers, Front Lowered on Coilovers, Xenons, Combined DRLs and LED Foglights to modified OEM front fog lamp position, Alcantara/Leather, Full Black Alcantara headlining + pillars and blind shelf, Bespoke Flat Bottomed Sports Steering Wheel, Dark Myrtle Wood, Autodim Mirrors, Bose, Blinds, Digital TV, Ski Hatch, Modified rear exhaust section for extra V8 Burble 
Audi S8 D2 Final Edition 2002, Avus Silver with Red Leather Interior
Tiptronic with Sport mode button, Sony rear entertainment package, Bose sound system, Audi Navigation Plus, 20 inch Final Edition alloys, Full Cat Back Stainless Milltek exhaust, giving a great V8 burble
Audi A8L D2 4.2 Petrol with LPG - Ebony Black
Audi A8L D4 FL 4.0T Petrol twin turbo - Havana Black
Audi A2 1.6 FSi Sport - Dolphin Grey with Votex body kit and Red Leather Interior
and some other A8's A8L's and Mercs
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