Well - I had temporary success after the battery went flat when I left my VCDS cable plugged in - all alarms were still there on startup but disappeared after driving 50 yards or so! Unfortunately, they came back almost exactly 24 hours later.
Having exhausted my limited talents, I resorted to visiting a highly recommended independent garage who confirmed that the EEPROM in the controller was toast - hence why adapting the pad thickness etc had no effect. Controller now replaced and all is good - finally!
Unfortunately, he also noticed that the bushes are pretty much knackered on the front control arms so I'm not finished yet.......
Thanks to all for their help.
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2005 A8L W12 Almond Beige
2008 Jaguar XK Convertible
1971 Jensen Interceptor II (soon to be Mendip Blue)