It really is simple

1. When pins 85 and 86 get 12v they close pins 30 and 87 (4pin relay)
2. When you press the remote button the green wire on the latch goes to 12v to open the latch.
3. Connect the green wire (12v) to 86 and brown (ground) to 85. Now pressing the remote button will activate the relay and close pins 30 and 87.
4. Now relay pins 30 and 87 should be connected to pins 2 and 3 (center 2 pins) of the close switch, as relay will short them when activated - same as the button does.
Have to do this myself when i find some time.