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#1
21st January 2011, 11:47 AM
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How BMW Drivers think.....
A day from the diary of a BMW driver...
"The other day I was cruising along as usual coming onto one of my motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars. First off, I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway! The driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn. Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane. Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110 mph enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70 mph! Naturally, I got within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way. Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car. Needless to say, I was eager to oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast! Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my drivers licence to a police station to be sent away to have some points put on (they're not free points either - they're £20 each and I was only allowed 3 L). But the man at the police station said that because I drive a BMW, it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me! See, now THAT'S the sort of respect you get when you own and drive a BMW! 
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#2
21st January 2011, 12:34 PM
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Lol very good! I like it.
wish I could upload this to the Mini forum..... but it would be taken as a insult to the BMW mini and BMW "bashing" is banned  Shame. this would have gone down a treat with most people!  
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A8 Sport '99 4.2 V8 STOLEN 19/01/12 '92 Mini Mayfair (Sold) '80 Mini shell + V5 (for Sale) '72 Mini Pick up Supercharged 1380 '03 S4 Avant
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#4
21st January 2011, 03:51 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Conan (the Librarian) Watch it if you dare Currently, 2000 S8, Merlin Purple, Leather Pack 1, Winter Pack 1, SPAX adjustable suspension, AP Racing 6 pot front caliper, 385mm fully floating disks, EBC Yellow Stuff Pads, Black Diamond grooved rear disks and predetor pads, D2 Doctors Brake Block. 1997 4.2 A8SQ - the Projekt. 12 years and ongoing! 1997 4.2 A8SQ - Ming Blue. Restoration sat waiting; saved from the Scrapyard 2003 C5 Allroad 4.2Q - Cobolt Blue. Towing car. Laid up awaiting manual conversion. 2005 C5 Allroad 2.5TDi FE - Grey - Workhorse. 2015 Q3QS SLine - Daytona Grey. Lots of extras! Long Haired Admirals cutter. Previously 2003 C5 A6 1.9TDI FWD - Loaner from D2 Doctor Lifex 1997 S8 - Ming Blue. Loaned out and written off. I loved that car. My first engine swap after cambelt failure. 1996 4.2 A8SQ - Ming Blue. 178k on a cambelt! Trader's 8. Delivered to A8Parts at Lifex. 2003 2.8 A8SQ - powder blueish. Fill in for a while. Sold on. 1998 1.8T A4 Avant FWD. Ming Blue (there's a theme here), PEX for the 97 S8. And a list of non VAG going back 40 years before I saw the light.
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#5
21st January 2011, 07:40 PM
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 On que... Sorry but I see way more Audi drivers (usually 2.0 TDi) then BMW drivers driving like cocks. It's fun though, i've debaged the 4.2 from the back of my car so they are easily a dot in my rear view in a few seconds. Neil, I actually think BMW did a good job of the mini just like they did with the Rollys Royce, it's still unmistakably Mini whilst having a more modern design. I've driven the supercharged one and some basic 1.6 ones but the clubman is disgusting and the A1 is a much better car overall. (I drove them back to back)
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2009 Audi RS 6 Saloon V10 - 420mm Ceramics, Keyless, Soft Close, Adaptive Cruise, Glass Sunroof, Blinds, Twin Pane & UV, Freeview & DAB, High Beam Assist, MTM bits, Audi Exclusive Bits, MRC, Milltek, GYEF1 ASY2's, Bluetooth streaming music to AMI mod - 753 PS/1021 NM 2016 Audi S3 Saloon, Sepang, S-Tronic - B&O, Tech Pack etc... Company Car 1995 Audi A8 4.2 V8 quattro Sport - Bose, Solar, Blinds
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#6
21st January 2011, 07:54 PM
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Hee Hee..
To be fair to Amar, last time I drove home from Old Trafford, my passenger (a beemer driver) kept pointing out how all the aggressive drivers were Audi owners......... .........so I nutted him.... 
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#7
21st January 2011, 08:14 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Conan (the Librarian) Watch it if you dare Currently, 2000 S8, Merlin Purple, Leather Pack 1, Winter Pack 1, SPAX adjustable suspension, AP Racing 6 pot front caliper, 385mm fully floating disks, EBC Yellow Stuff Pads, Black Diamond grooved rear disks and predetor pads, D2 Doctors Brake Block. 1997 4.2 A8SQ - the Projekt. 12 years and ongoing! 1997 4.2 A8SQ - Ming Blue. Restoration sat waiting; saved from the Scrapyard 2003 C5 Allroad 4.2Q - Cobolt Blue. Towing car. Laid up awaiting manual conversion. 2005 C5 Allroad 2.5TDi FE - Grey - Workhorse. 2015 Q3QS SLine - Daytona Grey. Lots of extras! Long Haired Admirals cutter. Previously 2003 C5 A6 1.9TDI FWD - Loaner from D2 Doctor Lifex 1997 S8 - Ming Blue. Loaned out and written off. I loved that car. My first engine swap after cambelt failure. 1996 4.2 A8SQ - Ming Blue. 178k on a cambelt! Trader's 8. Delivered to A8Parts at Lifex. 2003 2.8 A8SQ - powder blueish. Fill in for a while. Sold on. 1998 1.8T A4 Avant FWD. Ming Blue (there's a theme here), PEX for the 97 S8. And a list of non VAG going back 40 years before I saw the light.
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#9
21st January 2011, 11:33 PM
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The BMW Mini (BINI) it a soleless piece of poo compared to the British Classic!
__________________
A8 Sport '99 4.2 V8 STOLEN 19/01/12 '92 Mini Mayfair (Sold) '80 Mini shell + V5 (for Sale) '72 Mini Pick up Supercharged 1380 '03 S4 Avant
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#10
23rd January 2011, 09:24 AM
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I had it alongside my 8 and I got as much of a smile of the Clubby as i did in the 8. Having driven the BINI, it's lost all mini character for me. Yes, it a good car but for me a. it is not 'mini' [it's 2ft longer and 1ft wider than the original] and b. the driving characteristics are like that of any modern hatch being nearly twice as heavy as the original. DOn't get me wrong...it's a nice car in the same way the golf and a3 are but it isn't a mini for me  -Oli 
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 CURRENT: 2006 Audi A8 D3 4.2 Tdi QS - CLICK HERE FOR PROJECT THREAD: Audi Exclusive Azure Blue, Amaretto brown interior, facelift rear lights, S8 mirrors, B&O, ACC, Digital TV, glass sunroof, Fridge, Extended Leather Pack 2, wooden steering wheel & gearknob, keyless entry, keyless start, electric boot, softclose doors SOLD : 2000 FL Silver D2 4.2 QS - Solar sunroof, Bose, Blinds, NavPlus, Playstation, DVD, wireless headphones, iPhone AV connection, RS6 steering wheel, chrome mirrors, phone prep, xenons, servotronic steering, Rear screen, TV-in-motion, NavPlus Alu rings, S8 exhaust, S8 bonnet grille, 385mm D3 S8 brakes, rubber winter mats, De-badged rear, US rear indicator clusters, 20" Final Edition diamond cut wheels, 15mm Eibach Pro spacers (front), 20mm H&R hubcentric spacers (rear). Audi A8/S8 D2 Flickr Group
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